Applications - Effective Meetings (1/21/10)

Just as classes are a type of meeting, my own social life in Roleplay Gaming is also expressed in types of meetings. Here are the best ways I can think of to use the lessons in that venue:

• Pre-Communicate - Since this hobby is based on creative storytelling and improv, if the group knows what to generally expect from the upcoming session then they can better prepare themselves for things when they start and perhaps have opening plays in mind.
• Pay Attention to Process - Like meetings, game sessions proceed along certain lines and often have limited time to take place in. Often this is 3 to 7 hours (depending on the group), but the process can be almost identical to meetings. Preliminary - Game Master (meeting leader) narrates a recap of the last session, introduces players to the immediate events, and reminds them of their current defined goal. Kickoff - This is the interaction portion where players will make story actions to reach goals, negotate for better chances of success, and then deal with any new issues or goals. Summary - The GM brings the current story segment to a close, narrates where everyone is and what they are about to do, and makes certain everyone is clear on what will be happening. Evaluation - RPGs use an abstract currency known as "XP" (Experience Points) in almost all cases, and are used by players to gain larger possible margins of success in certain actions for future stories. This currency is awarded by the GM, but by using meeting techniques we can also introduce time for the group to point out who they feel might be most deserving of additional XP.

Lessons Learned - Class 6: Effective Meetings (1/28/10)

I have both been a "victim" of a bad meeting, as well as likely helped perpetuate more than a few. It's a difficult task, to have a good meeting. Sure, we have guidelines and plenty of notes and information on what to accomplish and what should be accomplished, but there are many times when an issue is more than can be contained by the guidelines.

Now, what we learned in class is not without merit. The more quantitative measures (limit who attends, designate achievable topics, pre-communicate what expectations are) are the easiest to enact and go a long way to limiting more complex issues later. It's also important to remind the entire meeting that it is everyone's responsibility to maintain expectations, and not just the meeting's head.

Applications - Conflicts (1/26/09)

After studying the conflicts chapter, I see the following items most applied in how I do things:

• I'm taking more time after a conflict in how I phrase my response, but I'm also communicating that that is what I am doing. This will hopefully mitigate assumptions that will damage future resolution.
• Passionate conviction is not bad, but there needs to be a method to show others how important a point is other than to stick to it. Give both sides in a conflict the opportunity to articulate how critical certain points are with the proviso that they cannot frame it as it being important to just them. Perhaps that will help sides examine their own points and reveal further issues in both conflict and debate.
• Illustrate forgiveness as something deserved, and without condition. Just saying that you are ending a conflict without reprisal helps future communications, but showing why you forgive can also help the other party understand your reasons better and might even make them reflect again on why they fought your point of view.

Lessons Learned - Class 5: Conflicts (1/26/10)

This is a topic that I have difficulty with when things go very wrong. As I voluntarily stated in class, I have the potential to be a very bitter person that holds a grudge when I feel I have been wronged. This comes after I usually find that a conflict cannot reach resolution without giving up a part of my self-worth (which might be inflated or not... I'm still trying to find a therapist that will be able to decide on that), thus violating my personal ethics.

This isn't a self-help blog, though, and it isn't a place for me to vent my personal woes. But I will say that by at least recognizing my failing in an essential aspect of team dynamics, and focusing on who and what "deserves" the energy I put into maintaining these unhealthy grudges, I have developed a series of qualifications for where I stop trying to resolve a conflict. I feel that it's a pretty high threshold.

Now, to get back on track...

Of all the lessons being talked about in class, it was the temper one that I felt was the most profound. Anger is the single greatest barrier to resolving a conflict, because I have yet to see such a thing as "Logical Anger". We can't analyze both sides when tempers flare, and if at least one side approaches the table from a standpoint of indignation then they may see any attempts at finding a mid point to be condescending.

Applications - Teams (1/21/10)

I'm one of those people that can be the overachiever, the one that is so willing to take on some extra load if others are struggling. Many times this results in me getting overwhelmed and then becoming one of the chronic procrastinators. I need to work harder in the future to keep things equal, both for my own sake and the sake of my team.

As a leader of a team, I still feel I need to inspire the others to put more on the line, though I don't know if this is because of an actual need to help raise them up or because of different ways of communicating. Right now I feel at times that my team is getting intimidated by how much emotion I'm willing to put forward, though I do not feel that they are attempting to loaf about.

Lessons Learned - Class 4: Teams (1/21/10)

I don't have a fear of public speaking. You can't, really, if you're a sales person who runs product demos and help workshops. But I am terrified of taking personal risks, and I did that when I spoke on Thursday.

I worked on my notes until early in the morning, having downed an entire pot of coffee as I poured over the required reading and then looking for how I could interpret with my own words. I only used maybe 3/4 of those notes because I don't like speaking from a script, one of my first risks. I had no idea how exactly everything would come together because no amount of rehearsal will predict where my emotions might take me and what reactions I might get from my audience.

I took a risk my putting those emotions on the line, by showing the class that I wasn't willing to fade into the background. For a lot of people, being confronted by someone that isn't willing to conform to expectations can be unnerving and sometimes even make them hostile. But being shown something new can also make people sit up and take more notice of what you might say or do. I suppose I'll see eventually how effective I was.

Everyone is taking some degree of risk as they stand up and do these talks, because without risk there is nothing to gain. It's also being driven home on just how much each person is standing there for the teams and how they can't act like they just affect themselves. For me, it's about how I need to stop being afraid that things are going to fall apart in my hands.

Lessons Learned - Class 3: Negotiations

(Note: this post is late, I know, but there's no sense in not doing the work)

Negotiations is actually something I learned intimately in my life. My father worked as a state labor negotiations lawyer for Wisconsin all through my childhood, and it showed in much of his parenting. This isn't to say he did a bad job as a father, but there is something surreal in sitting down at the age of 10 to negotiate your allowance contract with the various duties and even clauses.

So, sitting in class, it was actually most informative to listen to how others viewed the process of negotiating between people than it was to do the reading. Actually... let me correct that; having read definitions and confirmation of the text book's views, it was enlightening to see how other people viewed negotiating. For so many it was a way to settle disagreements or to gain what they needed. However, to me, negotiating has always been more of a way to know how best to coexist with others. It's a way to know where the boundaries lay in mutual need and what to expect in reciprocation of favors.

Now, there were some definite finer points that spoke to me as I worked through the text and listened to the lecture. Understanding the different methods of questioning to reach a win-win situation has made me re-examine my own methods, and it's also made me look closer at how others approach.

Resources for collaboration - Personal recommendations

While not a requirement of our classwork, I am going to post up the following information for any in our class that might be seeking tools to help maintain team communication:

(#1) - Google Wave

Not even out of beta testing, this new Google product is a fusion of online document writing and chat program. "Waves" are collections of comments and ideas that are usually longer and more in-depth than standard online chats, and those that have been invited to participate in the Wave can answer to any individual posting rather than having a simple linear train of thoughts. Add in the ability to re-edit existing ideas and a "Playback" feature that allows anyone to read the Wave in the order that comments were posted, and you have a unique tool for working together over distances. This is an invite-only service right now, but I have plenty of invites if anyone ever wishes to try this program.

(#2) - Google Docs

A stripped down and basic suite of Office programs, Google offers this service to anyone that gets an account with them. All documents are stored online, and can also be shared with other users in your gmail address book.Give them read-only or edit access, and anyone in the group can see how someone's project is coming along and even help it along if so wished.

(#3) - Skype

Once again, a free access program. This one is a Voice-over-Internet calling and chat program, allowing for conference calling and text chat in the same package. Higher quality than most of the other chat systems that added Voice on after the fact, Skype also offers users paid accounts to allow for voicemail and even a phone number that others can call from any phone anywhere. If you want to just use the free voice chatting, headsets that combine headphone and microphone can be had for $10 to $100. Prices vary depending on quality, features (such as wireless connection), and design.

Lessons Learned - Class 2: Leadership & making it work

The second day of class came and brought with it a number of new challenges, chief among them my first time looking at my own style of leadership.

I have had to often question my own leadership techniques due to past experiences, moments where I have lost many people's respect due to how I lead a group. However, what I have found is that there was a general consensus amoung groups on what makes a good leader. Everyone seemed to believe that good leaders were ones that had conviction and an ability to drive their fellow team members forward. I'm hoping that my drive to gain exceptional marks in this class will inspire the rest of my group to do the same, and I am hoping that by approaching some matters from outside of the box I will be able to not only lead well but create a sense in my team mates on how important they all are to the process of our mutual grades.

The truth is that I will be relying on my team members to help me find my weaknesses and correct them, and for that reason I will likely begin pushing them slowly harder and harder until they tell me what must change. Right now I'm getting perfect scores from them, but we all need work and I'll be addressing that directly with the next class. I also will be taking the next presentation assignment, so as to force the rest of my group to examine my style compared to theirs.